JM Kearl’s weekly update! 1/28/24

Hello, hello! It’s JM for the weekly update. I realize this hasn’t been every week but sometimes I don’t have much to update on lol.

I will be heading to Florida this upcoming week! I’m so excited to be in the sunshine and nature and get lots of writing done! I’ll be posting updates on my social media if you’re interested in seeing this adventure.

Going on month-long stays away from home wasn’t something that was always possible for me.

One thing I want to include this week is my own personal growth journey. There was a time I didn’t believe any of my dreams were really possible. I didn’t think I could write a book thousands or even millions of people would love. I was playing small. I had limiting beliefs about my life. Of course I dreamed of it but I didn’t think it was actually possible.

There were days I woke up and was in a bad mood and I didn’t understand why. I now know why that is but at the time I didn’t. I was lost about where I wanted to be.

For many years all I believed was you had to go to school and get a job and work for some company until I eventually retired and then died. See, I come from a family that the formula of life was to graduate high school and get a job to pay bills. College wasn’t even a thing unless you really wanted to. It was mostly get a job. I served in restaurants for years, and hated almost every day of it lol. There was also the path of, if you choose the right husband you can be a wife and a mom and can stay home while your husband gets a good job and provides. You might get a vacation two weeks out of the year, if you can afford to go anywhere.

I’m not saying there is anything wrong with that. I have a wonderful family, they are good people. There is nothing wrong with going to work for a company and make a good living, and I love staying home with my kids but I can’t just do that. I have to create. That life felt suffocating for me. ME.

I HATED that idea of the 9-5 life or the restaurant life forever. I never resonated with it. I hated working for other people and having a boss dictate my time and my days and had control over what I could and couldn’t do. Want a day off? Boss says no, so begrudgingly go to work or get fired.

It was killing my spirit… but always in the back of my mind there was a little hope that said there was more.

When I was 18 I discovered my love of writing fiction. Discovering these new worlds I could create with my mind, and characters and love stories. I loved it so much but society told me that it wasn’t realistic to do it for a living. Hence why I was a waitress/server. It was to pay the bills. There was no “job” that I wanted to go to school for. There really wasn’t a job I wanted at all.

Even other writers I knew would say it’s more of a hobby and that I had to get a real job unless I got lucky and eventually got published but even then it probably didn’t pay that well… which implies that writing isn’t a “real job”

It took me over a decade from graduating high school to get past all that.

One of my biggest fears is that I won’t have lived up to my potential. That I’ll die leaving so many things I wished I would have done on the table. That I didn’t accomplish what I was meant to do with my life. It haunts me when I think about it.

So I’ve decided that won’t be my life.

The thing that was able to really make me start believing in more was immersing myself in personal growth and reprogramming what I thought was normal/possible.

If you don’t believe something is possible, you won’t even try.

I also took the “how” it was going to be possible out of the equation to start. I just believed what I wanted was possible and if other people could do it, even if it was rare, then I could too.

I listened to people like Tony Robbins. I listened to an audiobook of his years ago and for years I continually had inspirational people playing in the background while I cleaned houses for a living and when I’d be at home with my daughter while my husband worked.

And I still do this. I was just listening to Tony Robbin’s free seminar Time to Rise this weekend on youtube. It was amazing. I’d highly recommend if you’re feeling stuck, or even if you’re not.

You all may know I published 8 other books before I wrote Bow Before the Elf Queen. And I still have bigger aspirations. When people think of fantasy and romantasy books I want them to think JM Kearl, and I’m not there yet but I believe I will be. I still think the Elf Queen series is in its infancy. Most people haven’t read it or don’t know about it!

My story is one of persistence and fighting for my dream even if I took many blows on the way. Even if there were days I didn’t want to get out of bed. Or rough times like in my post partum depression phase and I didn’t want to be alive anymore.

Just like in a novel, those challenges can make our character grow. I can now relate to people who have deep depression and how to get passed it, when before I couldn’t understand it and certainly couldn’t be helpful. It taught me to discover more about nutritional deficiencies and how lack of minerals and vitamins and a hormonal imbalance can severely impact mental health.

You can be the main character in the book of your own life. Go on that hero’s journey!

It doesn’t have to be writing, it can be anything! Start that blog, travel to that place, start the business, write the book, be the stay at home mom who loves to cook, do what it is you want, and doors will open for you.

The “how” will reveal itself along the way.

It might seem impossible or overwhelming at first but keep your mind on the vision.

I 100% believe that when you knock on the door, God opens it, you just have to be willing to walk through it and keep going and when one door shuts, another will open.

You have to be willing to show that you want the dream. You have to have a vision for your life and walk that path or turn the page of your book and write the next scene! You can’t keep your feet planted on page one.

My aspirations continually grow when milestones are hit. Right now I’m writing book 4 and getting back into shape. I’m writing in my gratitude journal, and making an even bigger vision for my life.

The world may seem dark right now but your world doesn’t have to be. Be a light.

Elf Queen book 4 is definitely underway. I really really want to give some teasers but I feel like its too soon. But I have a vision for this book and its epic and romantic. Val, War and Hel and friends will definitely be put through some rough times but none of them take shit lying down so the enemy is in for a fight!

I can’t wait for you all to read it when it’s time.

Anyway, that’s it for today!

TTFN,

JM